It has been 9 months since our house caught fire. I can remember it like yesterday. How I entered my mother's room, helped her up and walked with her from her bedroom to her bathroom. I just felt the need to open up my bedroom door to see flames. How. What. Just how. I grabbed water and a bucket and tried to get the flames down before alerting my mother. When it became unbearable, I told her and she called out my brother to help with the fire. Flames kept rising. I was hysterical. I couldnt understand. I can only now remember my broldest brother just standing there not doing a thing. I dont know about him, but I had valuables in the house. Things with real sentimental vakue. All he kepot doing was yelling at me I couldnt understand why. Two friends of mine entered the bedroom with multiple attempts to save it. But my oldest brother still just stood there. I

My brother is not perfect. JHe is no saint but I know that he could of at least helped a little bit. instead of trying to yel and argue with ,me. I was sober and had a very clear mind. But he just got home from rehab and I feel that he thought he was better than us. B

Now, weeks after the fire, I am told that he will not let me speak or see my mother until I go to rehab…..

I wont go to rehab. I fact I REFUSE to go to REHAB.

WHY?

Because I have called on the name of the Lord each and eeryday since the fire to guide my ways and lead astray of the drug life. Now My pride wont allow me to go to rehab to prove something to him when all along i know i have god by my side.

It has been 7 months of sobriety for me, still I have not stepped foot into a rehabiliatation center. He wont even hear me out. Listen to what I have to say. NO ONE IS PERFECT. Lord knows Im not. im writing a book on my journey to self rehabilitaion