Since late last year into this year I’ve been consistently getting more and more depressed. My life isn’t going anywhere and I’m tired of trying. Why should I keep on trying if I’m going to always be depressed. I’m growing more and more tired of living in this city as well. I don’t connect with anyone anywhere and I’m tired of being around people. I feel totally and completely disconnected from people in general. I don’t belong anywhere and no one besides my parents cares. More and more often I wish that I wasn’t even born. No one asks to be here and I would rather cease to exist than to continue to go through this.
Looking for a job is becoming more and more difficult and I’m always miserable. I don’t relate to anyone, and no one relates to me. There really is no point in being here anymore. I’m thinking about writing a suicide note to my parents but I haven’t done it yet. Nothing good is happening for me right now and it doesn’t seem like anything good is going to happen ever. Life in general is pointless and my life has no meaning. I don’t see the point of going to the hospital again, I think suicide is a better option. I feel like a burden to my mother and I really hate my life. I don’t want to be around anyone and no one really helps me. The medication I’m on doesn’t seem to work. There’s no reason for me to continue living. Nothing changes for the better everything just gets worse. I’m out of options and I’m done trying. I have a plan for how I would kill myself and I’m planning it soon. I don’t have a life and I hate living I’d rather be dead.