It's actually my first time to write a blog again after a long time. Hope I still know how to make a sensible one, lol.

Well, I've been feeling kinda sad and left out lately. The relatives I'm closest with (they're a whole family) no longer invite me when they go out (my immediate family are all overseas). In the past, they usually would. My passive aggressive self tells me that I should decline any invitation from them, if any, in the future. I don't really have friends that I go out with on a regular basis so they're the only ones I usually go out with.

Also, my online friends seem to ignore me or aren't interested to talk with me. But then maybe it's because I come off as uninterested when I reply to them delayed and with just short responses lately. I've been busy the past couple of weeks though, going out to finally have physical therapy done for my scoliosis and doing some errands so I've had less time and would usually be too tired to go online after arriving at home. I don't have a smartphone which most people use when they're lying in bed or resting, lol.

Maybe it's because I'm being negative again and that energy comes through in everything I do? I'm thinking that maybe if I get back to meditating that would help. It's really difficult though, to maintain a regular meditation schedule.

I've been struggling with this sad feeling since a couple of days ago and been trying my best to let the feeling go and just focus on doing the stuff I'm supposed to do for the day but then something would come up, like in my Facebook feed, and remind me about it.

I'm actually proud of myself that I was able to go out of the house regulary the past couple of weeks and as a result procrastinated less and did more meaningful stuff and chores instead of just spending hours online reading up on something random, lol.

Really glad that there's still an active social anxiety website like this one because the old anxiety websites I frequented before are gone now.