Not too bad of a day today. Appart from the nagging ankle injury, but pain killers seem to be keeping ahold of that for the most part.

I have been thinking alot today about getting back into work. I know that when i’m not busy doing things, that is when I seem to find myself thinking too much, and doing things that are not good for me, IE drinking. In the paper today there are two positions that scream out to me to apply. One is a casual position as a front receptionist at a hotel in town. It seems ok, though i’m not so good talking face to face with people. But the casual is the thing that really calls out to me. The other, is a call centre position that is full time. The company that is offering the position has a really good reputation and after looking over the selection criteria and job discription I think that I would be able to fit into this position really well.

I’m fluctuating between going for it, (the second one) and then thinking that I shouldn’t go for it cause i’m not going to get it anyway. I need to pluck up the courage and go for it., God knows I need the money. Starting salary is almost 40,000 a year which is pretty good for a starting salary. I’m scared to apply, but i’m also really excited to try and get back into the working environment. Maybe this is the kick in the but that I need? Am i ready for such a commitment though? thats the thing.. I mean I just came out of hospital like yesterday. But right now i’m feeling good. Things are starting to look up. Would this just top things off? So many questions no answers. ARGHHHHHHH

I have so much self doubt. I wish I had some confidence in my abilities.