I'm back in school!!!! meaning i passed all my classes with a C or better! Why am i sad though? well… i'm all alone… again. i'm in a new hall and it is known for it's drama. Persons with depression don't need drama. but what can i do. i don't even know my roommate. i haven't seen her at all. i haven't even heard from my friends (if i can even call them that).

But i cannot get into the cycle again. i ave to keep positive. yet it is hard to do when i know that my mother is sick at home. the stupid electrical stromes that passed by took out the power at the hospital. and now i don't even know when shi's going to have her surgery. even worse, i wasn't able to teach my brother how to give my mom her insulin. I'm really worried about that. since my mom got sick i have been sleeping with her to make sure she was okay and breathing and help her if she needed to get up. now that i'm at school again, i worry more. i know my dad won't take care of her. and my brother is at school or at the gym or getting high.

damn…. i really don't want to be here. i've been wait listed in most of my classes anyway. and i need just one more class for 12 units. but i don't know the RA here, and i want to ask her/him about the "fun" classes they have here. AHHHHHHHH. they really need an emoticon that is pulling it's hair out.

I don't know what to do. wat to try. what to think. i have a million thoughts in my head. i just need someone to talk to…. i guess. before you suggest friends… i've tryed already. that is why i'm bloging.