So I have worked on myself. I have gone to communication counselling more than once because my mother thought it was me that wasn't communicating well, meanwhile I started counselling in highschool to figure out how to get along with a menapausol mother (not knowing I had anxiety yet). She was very difficult, but from the experience I earned how to say things differently and express myself better. I'm doing everything I can, everything available in my town except groups, I don't think I'm ready for that yet. Things are still hard though, mostly because after all the agencies I've and all the intakes, and working with family to help them understand my anxiety, is it wrong to be tired of explaining myself? I have tried telling one friend that I can ony handle so much stress, but she drops her relationship issues on my doorstep everyday. My only other friend has gone back to a bad relationship. My man is finally working on his inability to communicate with me (he doesn't want to say the wrong thing; therefor doesn't say a lot till it builds up). He has started, but I am now feeling like I need to write down anything I say to him so that he can see that he's asking the exact same questions over and over and claiming I never told him. What does one do when they have worked on themselves but the world around them continues to provides difficulties and issues and stop me from feeling secure? My mom has gotten a lot better and helps me out as much as she can, but even she has stopped hiding the pictures that trigger me when I go over. How do I change things? My man, my mom, and my only 2 friends that have stuck by me during the learning process of my disorders. What now….
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