I have been HIV positive for over 12 years now. Came to me as a big shock.
The first 10 year of being HIV positive didn’t tell any one for fear of what my friends might think.
In last few year I began to share with people, and to my surprise there where more people who understand, then I thought would understand. My Lord has put a lot of wonderful people in my life and a church family who really care. I think by sharing this could change another person life. Maybe make them think about what there doing. So many people think this only happen to the drug user or the people over sea. In 1980 I needed 15 pints of blood to stay alive I was bleeding to death. They asked me if I want my Pastor to come and talk to me they told me it didn’t look to good. But God had a plan for my life but at that time I didn’t know that. I was like a lot of us who are just living life to what we think is the fullest. So as I lay there in the hospital bed they came to me and told me they could not find a Pastor to come talk to me. So they gave me a tape player and to this day I don’t know what was on the tape. I was to proud to sit there and listen to a tape. So after 15 pints of blood they open me up to find out why I was bleeding .they found a tumor and removed it, and week later sent me home to get better each day I would go out to my bike and see if I could get it started so I could go see my friends. So after a few more weeks I was back on my bike, back out living what I thought was life. I began to get in trouble so I left the state that I live in to get away from the thing I was doing. So I went to live with my sister and I started going to church. And one night at a night Service I was listen to the Message that the Pastor was sharing about Jesus and how He die on a cross for my sins and how God love me even where I was at in my life God still love me. So that night I went forward and Gave my life to Jesus and asked Him to for give me of my sins and to take control over my life that I was tired of the life I was living. My life began to change I began to trust Jesus in every thing. So after a year went by I remarried my wife
Thinking This would be what God would want me to do. so We remarried and thing didn’t work out here I was thinking God change my life he would change her. But she told me that the church thing was my thing not hers so I stop going to church and began to live life for her and not my Lord . so one night I came home from work and she was gone.
She left me for another man. So I started drinking and hang out in bars I met a lady and we got married.
WE had been married for 6 years and I began to start feeling bad so I went to the doctor to fine out what was going on. And they told me there was nothing wrong with me so I went home and figure it was that I just work to much but another year went by and I told my wife that I was not feeling good and so I went back and I told the doctor there some thing wrong so run more test and still nothing and I told him there some thing wrong we need to fine out what wrong so the last test was for HIV and I figure I didn’t have any thing to worry about. So a week later I went back thinking I didn’t really need to go back and see what the test result where but I did any how
I went in the room and The doctor say your Positive. So I was like a lot of people what do I do now am I putting my family at risk by living in the same home. Who do I tell or don’t tell. First thing my Mom and Dad want to send me on a trip because they where worried I was going to die but I told them no I wanted them to hold off on that Ideal save the money in case I needed help to make my bills so they told me ok.
I didn’t know what to think and then I asked the doctor is my family going to be ok? Then I thought how will I tell my wife, but I knew I had too for her safty and the kids.
So on the drive home I told my wife and she began to yell at me she was so mad. God put some more people in my life who help me understand what I had and how I was not a risk to the people I was around but still in the back of my mind I felt like I was dirty that it would jump off me and I always worried about the people around me. but as years went on began to learn more about HIV and how hard it was for someone to get it .As long as I was not doing any thing that I should not be doing they where not at Risk
So after years of dealing with what I was going through I met a man name bill who was a Christian and he started sharing with me about Jesus and how I should be in Church and how I should be reading my bible and praying , and I said yes I know bro. so I started go to his shop every day because I enjoyed listen to him share his faith with me. And after a few week I began to go to Church with him. and I asked Jesus to forgive me of all my sins and to forgive me for not putting Him first in my life. Now I live every day of my life for Jesus and am thankful for all the wonderful brother and sister He has put in my life.
I must say I am truly blessed I hold on to God’s word for my strength .Psalm 23 I hold very close to The Lord is my Shepherd I shall not want Phil 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Psalms 23:4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
Psalms 23:6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
all the days of my life,
and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord
forever.
all the days of my life,
and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord
forever.
21 For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.
22 If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell
.
23 I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better.
24 But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account.
25 Convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all, for your progress and joy in the faith,
26 so that in me you may have ample cause to glory in Christ Jesus, because of my coming to you again.
See the reason for my life is Christ and to live is Christ. I am very thankful for my brother and sister in The Lord Jesus And I believe I am His and my life here is to give Him the glory in all I say and do and to share Jesus with the world.
Love Brother
Rick
Humble Servant
1 Timothy 6:12
12 Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses
Please do not forget…….He who prosised is Faithful, Heb. And Sek ye first His kindom…and all these things will be added unto you….and my personal promise…"but if from there". Thank you for sharing, we all lose sight sometimes of who is really in control.J
Thanks for speaking up and for sharing.