On Wednesday 3rd I was written up at work for saying things to employees that made them upset at management and made them say nasty things to the owner about their job. So because they were the ones who got upset I am the one who got written up. It was the last straw for me and on the ride home I lost it and wanted to drive my car into a tree. I did have the presence of mind though to drive to a friends house and from there it was suggested that I go to a mental hospital for observation. So a hospital visit and tons of people touching me later I ended up at a mental hospital.
I was terrified the first day but everyone there was very nice and welcoming and I made some life long friends. I was also diagnosed with COD co-occuring disorder. Which means I have both OCD and Bipolar Disorder type 1 with substance abuse problems that mask it.
A week and a half later and a few med changes I am finally feel balanced out and I am not having anymore manic episodes and I let 6 people hug me. It was not an experience I would like to repeat but it was helpful for so many reasons.
I have a lot of work to go through before things are settled but it's getting there. I have moved in with one of my friends and I am going to be all OCD and clean her place tomorrow.
The most important part of this story is that one of those 6 people I hugged was my mom. If you have this particular OCD problem then you realize how emotional that is and how much you miss it. So when I say best thing that ever happened I mean it.
I know exactly what you are going through…I am currently working to continue improving after spending some time in a mental hospital. I remember every detail of the first time I asked “can I give you a hug?” to a friend. It was so liberating.
I wish you continued success on your journey!
Great job hugging your mom! I'm happy for you.
Thank you everyone for the wonderful comments. I am doing better and my mom ruffled my hair yesterday and I didn't even realize she did till she mentioned it later that I didn't flinch.