So I was meant to record a female artist today, someone I had never met before, but at a very familiar setting.
I would have been just myself and the artist at the studio, so not a lot of people either.
I woke up feeling pretty crap this morning anyway, that sort of feeling that there is just something wrong and you basically don't want to do anything but to get back into bed and sleep so it will go away. I've also been pretty much house-bound for the last few weeks as well so I don't think it helped knowing that I had to leave.
Anyway, I managed to get as far as eating, getting dressed and driving about 3 minutes from my house (the studio I was working at is only 10-14mins away).
I get as far as the exit sign of our village and I can feel my body getting that pin-prick hot and cold sensation, next thing Im fighting for breath and my heart is racing along with a few normal traits. I knew exactly what was happening. In the end it got so bad that I actually turned around and ended up back home and cancelling the artist, which I see as a defeat to my anxiety and paranoia if i'm honest..
Admittedly, as soon as I was back in my comfort zone most of my symptoms went as they normally do, just leaving me with the thought of dread and sickness.
So I'm wondering, was it because I was meeting a new person, or because I was leaving my comfort zone… or probably both.
So I have devised a plan, which once i have finished i'm going to post to get feedback on and see if people think its a good idea..