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Breathe. You can do this. You can get through it. Just breathe. Breathe through the tears, through the pain. Why? Why doesit have to hurt so bad? Why do I get so upset. I am upset. I'm crying. I'm irratated. You don't get to pick and choose which parts of me you like. I'm not a science experiment to be dissected and distributed. I am me and if some aspect of myself, like my disease, doesn't fit your idea of what I should be like then fcuk you. I don't need someone constantly telling me that I need to get better, as if I wasn't working at it every single damn day. I will never be better by your standards. You want perfection not the beautiful messy imperfect me. I AM a friggin mess but if you can't handle the bad then I don't want you there for the good. You keep blaming me and I blame you, it's all just a waste of my time. No you will not talk to me later because I don't want to talk to you. I just want you out of my life! I want you to make a clean break. YOU choose to leave me so fcukin LEAVE! STOP straddling the fence and saying things like you have feelings for me and you never left me. YOU DON'T GET TO HAVE IT BOTH WAYS YOU LEFT! YOU didn't come home one night after work, YOU didn't talk to me for 3 days and didn't have the guts to even tell me it was over! YOU ARE FCUKING WITH MY HEAD! JUST STOP! God I wish I could just tell you off but you barely let me talk. When I do talk you always have a way of dismissing me. It's so frustrating! You are either with me or not. You don't get to pick to only be there for the parts you like. This isn't a movie, it's my life. End rant.

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