i can’t believe i trusted you
when i’d never win, i’d only lose
i knew you were a monster when i opened my eyes
but it took until today to fully realize.
you can never come home with me
i’m protecting myself and my sanity
i don’t care if it’s wrong, i don’t care if it’s fair
seems right to make you more than a little scared.
so go back to hell, the only place you belong
i’ll sing you to sleep with my suicide song
and now that it’s over and i’m lost at sea
you’ll start to regret your treatment of me.
and maybe you’ll never see me again
maybe you’ll never mess with my friends
maybe you’ll lose control of my life
maybe you’ll realize, you can’t darken this light.
i’m leaving, and i’m not coming back
you can pretend, dress all in black
but I won’t care anymore, i’ll get over you
because I know I have nothing to lose.
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I married a monster but I am getting divorced from him now. I like your saying.
Thank you, I’m glad you’re taking steps to make your life better:)
This is hard for me to read because I read it like your talking about me. I’m not a monster, but I have been at times. I broke things and screamed hurtful things. And it doesn’t matter, if it was my mental illness, that’s still what my ex got. And it was always one sided, just like with you. While I was depressed, she suffered too. But I see your side, and my ex’s too. As much as it kills me, I’m happy for her. She no longer has to have me suck the life out of her. And if he truly loves you, he would be for you too. Life’s not fair and we can only take so much. I have suicidal thoughts too, and I’m barely hanging on. But at least I won’t drag her down with me anymore. And I truly hope, life gets better for you too.
You know, I get that, because I feel like there’s a demon living inside of me and I do a lot of awful things that I only sometimes regret. But I guess there’s a good side of me, too, and it seems like there is for you as well. You seem truly worried about your ex’s safety and that means you care. I hope things get better for you as well, I honestly think you have potential:)