It has been a long journey. I have finally left the guy from California. He refuses to accept it. He simply keeps saying he wants to be together. One thing I didn’t realize that I want to share with people is there is this book that explained a term called “future faking”  The book is called, Not You: Identifying and Healing from Narcissistic People-by Ramani Durvasula PhD

With having anxiety and codependency issues both. I found the book to be not only helpful but like as if someone finally was advocating for me and explaining my story. I have looked high and low of the answers. I have never dated anyone in my entire life that would be future faking. I didn’t think to connect it to narcissism and yet, there it was.

I have seen three counselors. I have attended groups in recovery and reached out to friends to get through this. Detachment has been a long process.  It has been a long time trying to accept my parts and getting detached from total shame over this.