Well this is my first day here on this site. Thought I would list some stuff going on with me and some goals. lol I guess I just like to get right down to business.

         Yesterday, I worked out really hard to P90x  lean and realized I was WAY in over my head and so today I will be switching to Slim in 6 for 6 weeks and then go back to p90x classic. This is all a big deal to me because working out seems to worsen my anxiety and when it doesn't worsen my anxiety I just end up being awake all night if I did too much physical activity during the day. My body really has a hard time switching gears.  So I did not have anxiety from workin out yesterday but I was up all night unable to fall asleep and when I feel asleep I could not stay asleep.  I am determined to keep working out and see what happens. Maybe my body will eventually adjust.  It sucks because it used to be working out and doing other physical activity helped my anxiety but that is no longer the case.  So this will be a journey for me and if someone else has the same issues and would like to join me on this journey to fitness you are definately invited!  I started a support group on here under fitness called Anxiously Fit. So would love to see other's join. 

          Also I will try to blog my progress and how I feel about it but today I am starting a video blog on youtube about my fitness journey and my mental health issues as well in hopes that it will help others. I have searched ALL over the internet and really could not find others experiencing what I am with working out and anxiety. I know I can't be the only one lol. Everything I read states working out makes you feel better….puh.  Not me buddy ok.  My body loves to be very still and that is when I am at my calmest. I am an odd duck these days. Like I said it was not always this way for me.  I used to love to pace nervously with the best of them and clean and organize my house to keep my sanity but no longer.

        So I feel ok today. More palpitation episodes than I would normally have but once I am distracted they go away so maybe I am just expecting anxiety from work out yesterday and am psyching myself out. The sleep thing I know was not me causing insomnia though. I just kept waking back up and was itching to get out of bed all night. I was soooo bored.

       Switching subjects now…. I need to work on my workbook before my next therapy session. I am working on 10 days to self esteem. My psychologist makes me do it. It's hard work and I really was thinkin it was going to be a breeze. haha. How hard could it be? Just write down how you feel and answer the questions. Eh WRONG. You are asked to seriously analyze yourself and it's quite a pill. lol.  I am on Step 4 and he has me doing one step a week instead of one step a day. Definately more my pace.

       Did I forget to mention I am SORE today?

       Ok well I am headed downstairs to do my youtube vlog. look me up. The title will be Slim in 6 my anxious journey. I think. I change my mind about as much as the weather changes so we will see lol.  There are also some videos of my fam on there. I am afwifek on youtube as well. No laughing at me though! I reserve the right however, to laugh at myself lol. Take care and good mental health to ya!

        Oh crap I forgot to list my goals for today! Hold me accountable please tomorrow lol.

  GOALS:

workout

do some housework

shower because well….that's important lol

vlog

work on workbook