Learning to gently reveal who we are is how we open ourselves up to love and
intimacy in our relationships.
Many of us have hidden under a protective shell, a casing that prevents others
from seeing or hurting us. We do not want to be that vulnerable. We do not want
to expose our thoughts, feelings, fears, weaknesses, and sometimes our
strengths, to others.
We do not want others to see who we really are.
We may be afraid they might judge us, go away, or not like us. We may be
uncertain that who we are is okay or exactly how we should reveal ourselves to
others.
Being vulnerable can be frightening, especially if we have lived with people
who abused, mistreated, manipulated, or did not appreciate us.
Little by little, we learn to take the risk of revealing ourselves. We
disclose the real person within to others. We pick safe people, and we begin to
disclose bits and pieces about ourselves.
Sometimes, out of fear, we may withhold, thinking that will help the
relationship or will help others like us more. That is an illusion. Withholding
who we are does not help the other person, the relationship, or us. Withholding
is behaviour that backfires. For true intimacy and closeness to exist, for us to
love ourselves and be content in a relationship, we need to disclose who we are.
That does not mean we tell all to everyone at once. That can be a
self-defeating behaviour too. We can learn to trust ourselves, about who to tell,
when to tell, where to tell, and how much to tell.
To trust that people will love and like us if we are exactly who we are is
frightening. But it is the only way we can achieve what we want in
relationships. To let go of our need to control others – their opinions, their
feelings about us, or the course of the relationship – is the key.
Gently, like a flower, we can learn to open up. Like a flower, we will do that
when the sun shines and there is warmth.
Today, I will begin to take the risk of disclosing who I am to someone with
whom I feel safe. I will let go of some of my protective devices and risk being
vulnerable – even though I may have been taught differently, even though I may
have taught myself differently. I will disclose who I am in a way that reflects
self-responsibility, self-love, directness, and honesty. Higher power help me let go of
my fears about disclosing who I am to people. Help me accept who I am, and help
me let go of my need to be who people want me to be.

inner peace 2 all :tongue: