Puns for those with a higher IQ . (That would be me…..and you, of course)
Those who jump off a bridge in Paris are in Seine.
A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
Dijon vu – the same mustard as before.
Practice safe eating – always use condiments.
Shotgun wedding – A case of wife or death.
A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.
Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.
When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.
A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.
What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead give away.)
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.
She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed
With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.
You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
Local Area Network in Australia – the LAN down under.
Every calendar's days are numbered.
A lot of money is tainted – Taint yours and taint mine.
A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.
Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.
Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
Acupuncture is a jab well done.
-
Life in Recovery
jjrocksarizona, , Addiction, Anger, Anxiety, Career, Child, Relationships, Sex Therapy, 0
1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good. 2. When in doubt, just take the next small step. 3....
-
Keytags
jjrocksarizona, , Addiction, 0
KEYTAGS White – The international color of surrender. The suggestion with this key tag is to tape 50 cents...
-
Surviving Slumps
Theresea, , Addiction, 0
Surviving Slumps A slump can go on for days. We feel sluggish, unfocused, and sometimes overwhelmed with feelings...
-
Random Thoughts from a Random Mind
thingsithinkithink, , Addiction, Gambling, Religion, 0
I once philosophised that Confucius had once told me that "mean people suck," however, I only later realized that...
-
Random Ramblin (trigger warnings I guess.)
Jibstank, , Addiction, Anxiety, Depression, Marriage & Family, Addiction, Anger, Career, Child, Relationships, Religion, Sleep Disorders, Suicide, 3
They started fighting when I was 5 or so. I can remember the screaming and yelling and anger. I’d...
-
Vauling this Moment
Theresea, , Addiction, Anger, Anxiety, Codependency, Religion, 0
Valuing this Moment Detachment involves present-moment living — living in the here and now. We allow life to happen...
-
None
nextdooraddict, , Addiction, Addiction, Career, Relationships, 1
Were to begin this story? I have a lot to say so let me start at a point that...
-
Life and Recovery
jjrocksarizona, , Addiction, Addiction, Child, Grief, Religion, Weight Loss, 0
So we come into life kicking, scratching. biting, crying and naked struggling to live and breath born into the...