Hello everyone, I have not been on here for awhile and I wixh I never stopped. I think I stopped because I was doing pretty good there for awhile well for the most part.

Im having an attack out of nowwhere and its just me and my daughter here, I hate when this happens. Sometimes I just want to reach for the phone and call 911 but k know that wont get me better and I just have to breath through it and not think of stupid crap to keep it goiubg. Then you have those panic attacks where if you move you will get dizzy again and it will start all over. Oh and the panic attack came from me brushing my hair and since my head was bobbing up and down it didnt feel right so there you have a stupid panic attack.

I really do hate how the simplist thing can just take me to a whole other level, I hate that I cant just get up get ready for my day without asking myself, are you gonna be alright out there today? Am I going to passout in the car, in the grocery store?

I am a Mary Kay beauty consultant and for me to make my money I HAVE to go out and meet people and talk to them or go to their houses and give facials or a party where there is even more people.

My husband is in the army too and right now he is out on the field until next month on the 12th and we barely even get along anymore cause Im not who I use to be. I've tried explaining it and not it just seems like im trying to excuse myself out of what I need to do on a day to day bases.

I know this is a long rant but I needed to get stuff off my head and im sure I will post more later cause there is still a bunch in my head to get out and I would rather write it here then on paper.