I HAVE THOUGHT THIS OVER IN MY HEAD A MILLION TIMES,AND I'M NOT A GOOD WRITER SO HOPEFULLY THIS WILL TIRN OUT RIGHT.

FIRST OF ALL AFTER READING READING THE BLOG FROM KIM AND THEN THE ONE FROM GIGI I HAVE FELT REALLY BAD ,BECAUSE I KNOW THAT I WAS INVOLVED IN HURTING SOMEONE THAT USED TO BE ON THE TRIBE BY SIMPLY STATING MY OPINION ON SOME ISSUES AND BEING HATEFUL .

I AM NOT A MEAN PERSON AND THINGS I DO WEIGHT HEAVY ON MY MIND ,I LOST FOUR PEOPLE I REALLY CARED ABOUT AND CAN'T EVER TAKE THINGS I SAID OR DID BACK GUILT IS A HARD THING TO LIVE WITH AND I DON'T DEAL WITH IT VERY EASILY.

I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE PERSON GETTING KICKED OUT OF THE TRIBE I WOULD NEVER DO THAT TO ANYONE,I JUST GOT INVOLVED IN PERSONAL THINGS THAT WEREN'T MY CONCERN,BUT SOME OF IT DID START OUT CONCERNING ME AND MY FEELINGS,I LEFT THE TRIBE BECAUSE OF ALL THE THINGS THAT WERE SAID TO ME AND THE ASUMPTIONS THAT PEOPLE MADE THAT JUST REALLY DID NOT UNDERSTAND THE SITUATION,

SOME OF THE REMARCKS REALLY HURT ME I HAVE NEVER BEEN AN ATTENTION GRABBER ,I THOUGHT THIS PLACE WAS FOR US TO WRITE OUR FEELING ,THE PAIN WE FEEL ,THE SADNESS I NEVER WANTED THINGS TO BE JUST ABOUT ME ,ME,ME,LIKE SOMEONE SAID I NEVER WANTED PITTY,FROM ANYONE ABOUT MY BLOGS ,AND YES I DID GET HURT BY TWO GUYS ON HERE BUT THROUGHT GOOD ADVICE FROM ONE WOMEN I TRULY TRUSTED I HAD TO STOP SOMETHING BAD BEFORE IT HAPPENED SO I GOT BASHED BY HIM FOR IT ,THE OTHER ONE WAS JUST SOMEONE I TOOK TO SERIOUS

THIS IS MEANT TO BE AN APOLOGY TO THE ONES I HURT,I DONT EXPECT TO EVER GET YOUR TRUST OR FRIENDSHIP I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW HOW I FEEL ,SOME SAID I WAS MENTAL ,JELOUSE ,MEAN THAT HURT BECAUSE YES I AM JELOUSE AT TIMES,AND MENTAL ,BUT NEVER MEAN,! I LOVE EVERYBODY AND NOW I JUST SIT BACK IN FEAR OF SAYING SOMETHING WRONG I USED TO BLOG ALL THE TIME ,LEAVE A TON OF COMMENTS, THIS PLACE BROUGHT ME OUT OF THE HOLE I WAS STUCK IN I KNEW NOBODY WITH HIV EXCEPT THREE PEOPLE IN MY WORLD ,NOW I KNOW ALOT SO I DONT HAVE TO LIVE IN MY OWN LITTLE WORLD  I CAN FEEL LIKE OTHER PEOPLE.

ANYWAY THIS APOLOGY GOES OUT TO FOUR VERY SPECIAL PEOPLE ,I'M SORRY …LOVE STEPH