The more I learn the more I wonder….

I have been reading a lot of information and watching a lot of various kinds of vids about addiction. I'm trying to understand… why some become addicts and some don't. There doesn't seem to be a solid answer for that. I have 4 sisters and a brother…We all grew up together in a home with an alcholic father and a SUPER co-dependent mother. Some of us grew up to be addicts…and some of us did'nt.

Many times in my past I have myselfabused drugs and alcohol. I liked trying new things and I have always been very curious. I have smoked crack (and loved that euphoric high thats just for a moment), I have snorted meth and enjoyed the energy racing through my mind and body. I drank alcohol every day for about 6 months while I was getting past a nasty break-up. I would go to work, go to the bar and drink enough so I would be sure and fall asleep as soon as I got into bed. Enough to keep the "thinker" in my head from starting that non-stop bullshit chatter. I enjoyed going up to the edge and dancing for a bit… Most of my dancing was done to get past painful times in my life. And always I would come to a point and decide "o.k. this is enough" and I would just stop- cold turkey- and be sober…for months…years.

On the other hand………….I have 4 sisters….Sister # 1 will drink socially, and she was a dabbler in weed for a time in her teens, but does not use and has'nt for 20 yrs or so….Her daughter however is an 18 yr old homeless person…couch hopping, drinking heavilyand using whatever drugs that might come her way.

Sister #2 is alcoholic who has been sober for 23 years…she is involved in AA and takes her sobriety very serious.

Sister #3 Is and functioning (most of the time) active addict today.She has been getting high since 1972…She does not know how tohave a life withoutsome kind of drug.Her and her husband havebeen able to get and keep jobs for years… but they still keep dope as an active part of their lives.

Sister#4 is the family enabler…Oldest…caretaker of all…addicted to RX medsand"helps" Sis#3and my niece in any way she can. Sheis "loving" them to death as well as herself.

So…why some and not others….I am learning that there are many reasons.

I am becoming more understanding by learning…I amleaning toward really believing that it is a brain disease…some can't stop …even thoughthey want to. ……………………..It's complicated….and I constantly want to know more!!!

Peace ♥♥♥