i just feel like writtingalot latley and would like to talk to other people with anxiety.Alot of the times i feel like im the only one who understands whats going on with me but at the same time i completely dont understand.So anyway i think this blog thing will be good for me. i usauly have a panic attack every day. i hate being by my self because i usualy panic for the first half hour. but its impossible for some one to be with me all the time. i only drive short distances by my self, and some ones gotta be on speaker phone most of the time. when this first started i could hardly be in the bathroom by myself. so i have made progress. it feels debilitating. i work part time with my mom, thank god she has her own business. it is hard for me to find or even think about work right now but i have gotta do something. fist the doc put me on xanax and citalopram, did not like like it. imoff all medications now, i dont feel pills are the answer for me. i know how beautiful life can be and how lucky i feel when i look at things the right way. the problem is im always fighting with myself in my head., trying to stay positive. i wish i could just surrender to my purpose and enjoy the time i have here. im still searching for the right thing thats gonna just click for me to get through this. i have dreams just like every one eles and really want to get out of my own way. i feel exhausted most of the time, too much thinking, contimplating, how why what where. trying not to pass out from a panic attack. i know this is not the life for me or any one for that matter, it has to get better. sometimes though its questionable. so any advice on how to go about this? im trying everything, open to anything, but perscription drugs. thanks for reading.