i just feel like rambling, so if you feel like reading please bear with me…i have just been wondering to myself this evening whether or not you can simply be friends with everyone…when i joined this site a while back, i didn't log back on for a long time…then in september i hit my lowest point ever and wasn't sure i'd make it out, i'd either completely lose my mind or die…returning to this site, along with meds and therapy, rejuvenated my soul and restored my hope (it was gone)…no one has ever been unkind to me on this site, everyone has seemed helpful…but now i am faced with the dilemma of whether one can truly be friends with everyone…all this bickering on the site lately makes me so sad and seeing people i have become friends with bicker makes me even more sad…but there is nothing i can do, because i wasn't here at the beginning of the bickering, i don't know all the circumstances…but i do know one of those people has become a great friend of mine, a confidante in my battle…i feel friendly towards everyone still, but i think i worry by staying friendly with everyone, i hurt my friends…i mean, you're supposed to back your friends up…but i feel at a loss for that sometimes…i truly, and this is not bullshit, would just love us to all be here for one another, to stand strong as a community of people who have to battle a terrible disorder everyday, to know that each of us is struggling and we need each others kindness to survive…we should try our best to get along, because we all know how awful this disorder is already without bickering…for right now, i am friends with everyone, but if i will remain…well…
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I don’t think you should ever feel like you have to choose a side in these situations. Sometimes the best side is no side. We aren’t always going to agree with what our friends do, and we don’t always have to back them up to prove our friendship to them. The best thing you can do for any of your friends and yourself is to be yourself. If thats not appreciated or respected, then you know who your true friends aren’t. Hope you feel comfortable here again soon.
I appreciate your blog; I see your honesty and good heart in it. Obviously, I haven't known any of you for as long, but I feel the same way. I don't think anyone on here as ever said anything unkind to me, and I feel friendly toward everyone. I've worried some, too, that this could cause problems if I don't seem to be backing up my friends. But if people on different sides are my friends, the only way I can back them up is to stay out of it except for being here for them to talk to.
I agree with Raider 100 percent cuz that happened to me i tried sticking up for somene and it got me in the middle:)So best thing to do is be yourself and no sides!I think i wouldnt change sticking up for this person cuz i did what i felt right in my heart!I appreciate your honest blog! 🙂
No. You can’t be friends with everyone.
I know, it sucks. But the way humans are in general – it’s simply not possible.
Anyway, it’s unrealistic to expect to be friends with everyone, you’ll hurt yourself thinking this way! Thinking the world has to be a certain a way (ie; if you’re nice to everyone, everyone has to be nice to you, you have to be friends with everyone, ect) will only result in negative thought patterns and thus, will harm you more! And you don’t have to back any friends up, it’s not a requirement. It’s a choice. You can still be a friend without doing so!
Not everyone is going to love you, but why does it matter? What’s important is that you focus on who does love you, not those who may not. I know, I do this exact same thing. xP But I learned the hard way at work last summer – you can’t be friends with everyone.