Just a little bit about me here.. I’m trying to heal from my trauma and be a better girlfriend because my boyfriend deserves it and I want to be better than I am. We have a 4 month old together and live on our own. We’ve been having a lot of issues lately because I don’t show any emotions. I’m not a lovey dovey type of person.
I grew up with a controlling dad and a drug addicted mom who was barely around and in jail sometimes. My dad never showed any love whatsoever so I don’t know how to. I can’t express my emotions unless it’s anger because that’s all I’ve been shown. I was very sheltered growing up. I want to be able to show my boyfriend how I feel about him.
I’m a very shy person and it bothers me so much because we’ve been together for almost 7 years. I don’t know how to not be shy with him. I want to get better i just don’t know how to. I know I have a lot of childhood problems to heal from and I’m willing to. He’s willing to help me try to get better since I never gave up on him when he was going through the darkest part of his life.
If anybody has any tips they would be greatly appreciated.
Hey there, it’s okay to be more reserved. You do not have to be the most talkative person around to be very balanced and sociable. I also went through a lot of trauma and problems in younger age. One thing that helped me was to use the abusers as examples of what not to do. We can learn from our own mistakes which is very cool. However, it’s even cooler that we can learn from others mistakes too. Thus, maybe choose to do the opposite that was modeled for you. Act differently because you know how you were treated did not help you. Maybe try learning new social skills that help you understand how to communicate and negotiate a little better. Communication is one of the best skills we humans have. It’s one of the main skills colleges and universities teach and train all over the world. It’s one thing that separates us from wild animals, and you do not have to be in college to learn new skills or knowledge. Go explore options available such as books, magazines, YouTube videos, etc. Just focus on progress. You can do it :). Have a good day.