The problem with life is that it’s short. There is no room for time wasting or regret.
But that’s why we are all here. We regret the time we have wasted.
Fear is what leads to problems. Problems waste time.
Fear of whatever causes lack of self esteem, self belief.
It takes away our confidence.
If it wasn’t for fear there would not be OCD anxiety depression addictions etc.
There would also be no rich or poor. No jealousy, no hate no wars.
No homeless or starving people.
Would there be any need for religion? Probably not.
How do you get rid of fear?
Lots of people will give us so many different answers.
But we need to be careful. Some people will say just do it. But that’s foolish.
Suicidal thoughts are no good but no one shoulds say just do it.
Every few years after I relapse into depression and anxiety and the OCD takes over i realize that to beat OCD you have to just do it.
You have to ignore the thoughts and feelings. Dismiss the fears and anxieties.
As I typed the last sentence I thought about situations that make me uncomfortable and I realized I am a long way from fully beating the OCD.
I hate getting buses I think they are filthy. I change and wash my clothes after being on them. I rarely go on them.
But you know when I am traveling my OCD disappears. It mostly affects me when I am at home.
I fear picking up something and passing it on to my family. When I am away no such worries.
But I don’t get to travel much. And I would feel guilty at this stage.
I already feel guilty for what I think I put my family though.
Every now and then in a moment of clarity I remember that when I am at my worst I isolate myself and always have.
So if I was alone I was not causing my family trouble.
But why did I isolate myself.
Because of fear.
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not tolerated: experienced. Accepted. Fear takes place in time. It begins, it goes through you, and then it ends.
Once it ends you are free to act.
I learned actually from my mother: never act in reaction. We think we have no time? we have heaps of time.
We have no need to panic. We have no need to rush ourselves. If we never act until we have processed the emotion, then we are always acting from our core or centre, and then our steps are steady and our path is positive.
Fear will always be our companion, I think. I sometimes think if we were better at living with fear and heeding whatever it’s purpose is, we wouldn’t feel like it was dragging us around by the neck.
On a daily basis, it’s still about learning to live with it, though. Over the years, I’ve not stopped looking for tools to mitigate it, cope with it, even dissolve it. It’s still present in my life. The best I can do is understand it better.
It’s an astonishing thing, but I’ve had similar experiences while traveling. I always find travelling both incredibly stressful (almost always end up in tears at some point, sometimes in really awkward places) but also incredibly freeing. Why? I suppose because you don’t get to take your whole life with you. You worry mostly about today. What are you going to eat later? What time do you need to be up? You’re not on the usual hamster wheel with your whole life dragging at your heels. And everything around you is new and unfamiliar, people living their lives in strange ways you’ve never even imagined. If you had a bad experience today, you can leave it behind tomorrow and go somewhere else.
I once read about a UK travel blogger, Lauren Juliff, who had really serious anxiety issues, including an eating disorder. She decided to go solo traveling after university and she hasn’t really stopped since. She’s written quite a lot about what travel did for her anxiety. It’s fascinating.