We’re going to pretend that this is the reason I’m irritated, and ignore the fact that in an hour and a half I have to look someone in the eye and tell them that my mommy does my laundry for me, because I’m a useless human being, right?

I’m at the coffee shop that’s closer to my house than my regular. That alone should tell you something. They have an exquisite cafe with comfy chairs in fine style; they must have spent a fortune on the build-out. But it starts with the line. Not long enough that it should have taken me ten minutes to get my coffee, especially since four of the folks ahead of me got drip. And yet it did. The baristas move like they’ve got lead in their shorts. Clearly they don’t drink their own product. I don’t blame them.

Once I finally achieve my position of supplication in front of the register, I keep my request modest. Experience has taught me not to get my usual espresso-based beverage. One reason for this is that it costs $2 more than in any other shop in town. The other reason is that despite the fact that they have one of the best machines in the business, they feed it crap beans. Twice the cost for half the pleasure just makes me even grumpier than I am.

Instead I order a bucket of dark roast. She smiles and nods and pulls a mild. Sorry, I can read. That’s not dark roast. Only when I notice does she mention that they’re out of dark. Hmmm. So if I hadn’t said anything, you woulda just pawned the mild off on me? Nice.

But there’s a reason I’m here damnit, so I humbly take my bucket of mild and set up in a chair. One taste and I know my day is not looking up. There’s robusta in that coffee, or their roaster should be fired. Yet I persevere, and get my puter set up, hoping to find solace in the tribe. The wifi is insane. It seems to broadcast in waves, instead of continuously. Combine that with dt’s normal morning madness, and there’s very little chance of my getting into chat. Maybe that’s a good thing. Mood I’m in I’ll alienate everyone!!