we all have our own personal programs of recovery we work. we all have the way we live that life in recovery. we all work the steps at different speeds. we sometime say things that people respond to the wrong way. that is why i made amends a couple of blogs ago. i have worked the steps all the way through 7 times and i am back on step one again. life in recovery is a continious circle or cycle what ever you prefer. i can point out my own shortcomings. i don't need some one just because they have a couple of years more than i do telling how shallow my life and program are. normally here is the spot where i would say F$#k you. but instead i wil pray for you instead. it is not my fault that you think i have all the answers and that if you read my over 170 blogs you'll find the information the maharishi would give you on top of the mountain.


i do not have all the answers and have never said so. i also have said sometimes i don't even know the questons. but what i do know is i am open minded enough to take suggestions that have worked for somebody else. and see if they will work for me. the bottom line is we are not afraid to reach out for help. sure i have a couple of days back to back  7789 but i am still learning about me. the be reachable we have to stay teachable. for every action we make in recovery there is a reaction. do not be afriad to step out of your normal circle of recovery and recovery friends to learn more about you and the recovery process. you just might find the answers your truly searching for.


but please until you really get to know the real me, you know the one who had been using for 22 years and clean for 21 years do not pass any judgements on me or about me. i do not have to and will not put up with that crap. seek the truth and engage your crocodile brain before you open your alligator mouth and start shoveling the shit in. do you truly think i would blog what i do without having the knowledge of Recovery  in my mind and my heart? you better think before you answer that question. do you really think i would talk about recovery the way i do without having the knowledge that has been given to me so freely ready at hand to blog it to you. remember i give suggestions not advice. what you do with it is totally up to you. i do not have or want to even know if there is a cure to this disease we suffer from. i just want to staY CLEAN another 24hrs. remember that recovery is a journey not a destination and use the rest stops God provides along the way.


NA hugs,




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