I’ve been thinking a lot today (cue Ben Folds 5) about what spurred me to join this forum. And honestly, I think it’s just loneliness. For the past 8 years, I had a very hard, busy, stressful job but I worked with a lot of great people. And that was pretty much the only social interaction I had (for 8 years). I’ve always had a hard time making friends due to social anxiety and the group of 5-6 female friends I had from college sort of grew apart as people moved away and had kids and whatnot. At my job, I worked with a lot of people similar to me (young, female social workers) and we all worked so much, it was like we were family. I really didn’t have any friendships outside of work but the social interaction I got at work felt like enough.

I took a new job recently (one that is less stressful overall) but I work from home some weeks and other weeks I am teaching in a classroom but to a temporary group of participants (I’m a trainer for my organization). So i don’t really get to know anyone. In the past month, my mental health has declined significantly. I really love my new job and I know it was the right decision, but I’m now facing the fact that I have little to no social interaction for sometimes a week at a time. Most days, I don’t even talk on the phone because I read a lot of training materials and curriculum when I’m not teaching. My husband works a lot (12 hour days) so i really only see him for an hour or 2 at the end of the day and we’re both tired and getting ready for bed. I never saw this coming. And I have no idea how to make friends. I tend to come off an really awkward when I talk to people, if i can even work up the confidence to approach someone in a social setting. And the whole anxiety thing makes it hard for me to get involved in any kind of activities.

Today’s just been a really bad day and I wish I had someone in real life to talk to.