I'm in a crappy mood right now. Can't shake it off. So, here I sit an hour and a half past my self-imposed bedtime, furiously composing a blog post in an effort to vent the frustrations currently bubbling around in my skull. Here goes…
It was brought to my attention today that I'd screwed up on something. Actually, I and another gal had been making the same mistake on the same project a few times each. Which totally sucks to know. But the mistake was not unfixable and didn't cause any clients to fire us or cases to be lost by us.
That said, I do know the importance of communicating mistakes to people. How else will they learn, right?
What has me seething right now isn't that a mistake was brought to my attention. It is the attitude of the attorney who made the mistake known. Suddenly, all of the good work I've produced in the 7.5 years I've been at that firm means nothing. I'm stupid now. I'm incompetent now. (You don't need to actually say the words when your actions belie the feelings.)
What could have been a quick and professional "hey, I noticed XYZ Corp. wasn't up to date – can you take a look at it?" was, instead, an impatient, borderline unprofessional attitude in explaining to me, exactly, what I screwed up (because I can't read minds and I don't speak this attorney's cryptic verbal abbreviations).Chicken Little then marched on, in full panic because something wasn't right – which, of course, meant everything was wrong – and began not-so-quietly bitching about it to another person entirely (who freely admits she doesn't touch the project anymore). Bear in mind I sit about 12 – maybe 18 – feet away from this person. I could hearthem.
This is the kind of BS I left my last firm over. You don't treat mistakes the way you'd treat high school gossip.
You also don't discredit the proven track record of a conscientious employee just because you can't be bothered to make time for details and, therefore, need a scapegoat when you screw up on your own accord.
*sigh*For what it'sworth, getting this all out ishelping me unwind a bit…
It's not that no one "monitored" me before, as a certain coworker of mine was overheard suggesting about me. It's that the people who "monitored" me were smart enough to know the difference between a major screw up (worthy of drama) and a stupid, FIXABLE, fluke of an error (unworthy of drama). Sure, you make sure the person knows they made a mistake, but you don't suggest they can't do their job anymore because of the mistakes. Not unless you have nothing but mistakes coming out of the person… in which case, you'd better examine why they're not understanding their assignments before judging their ability to do the projects.
No, the people who "monitored" me before were not perfect. S could be a cold-hearted arse and A could be a diva. But you know what? I'd rather deal with the stress those two bring – all day, any day – over the stupidity of today. S would have taken that mistake straight to me FIRST to fix.. and he wouldn't have gone to another LAA to bitch about me (and certainly not one I sit 12 feet from). Same for A.
Today's lesson? Mistakes are like poops. Everyone makes them and no one likes to talk about them, but ifyou don't look where you're doing and stepin one, you don't snarling at the dog next door forhaving to poop.
Okay – worn down and ready for bed now. Thank you writing gods…