Everyone in this house is still hurt & can’t forget what happened.

I’m sick and tired of this tug-of-war game between my parents and myself.

Are they that naive that they can’t even acknowledge that their children are suffering.  Do you think they cared to ask how it makes us feel, what on our minds, or even taking an interest in our lives?

NO.

They just keep going on and acting like it’s another day; like nothing ever happened.

I’m so tired of this fakeness.

No one wants to associate with dad right now b/c of how he drunkenly announced the separation and "addictions".

Mom’s a wild card. Tries to keep it together, but she’s suffering internally and has been for so long, that it exhausts her to the point of taking it out on us and forgetting that she’s the backbone to this family.

The boys want to run away. They hate it here. They’re only in high school.

Sister is raising the baby with the help of my mother and myself b/c the baby’s father passed away.

Being the oldest of 5 kids, there’s never any time to worry about myself. It’s always been like this. I have to take on the responsability and the burden of everyone’s suffering. I’m the only one who has the guts to say or do anything. I’m the only one who can survive on my own.

I hate seeing mom suffer, but it’s gone too far. You can’t help someone unless they’re willing to help themselves first and she refuses to give it up.

Dad’s lost all my respect and once again there is a hugeeee wall of bricks between us.

This is a really difficult and challenging time in my life. 

Be lucky when you can see a bit of sunlight from my window… The future looks very gloomy…Just like the weather, my mood swings are unpredictable.