I haven't texted X since Monday night. I feel a little upset about it because I'm still addicted to that small sliver of hope that I know, in my heart, is a joke. But at this point I don't think anything has changed. He's probably still groveling for his ex back no matter how badly she treats him and nothing I do or say will ever change that.

I haven't removed the Facebook friend request though…that's me passively holding on like a fool…

Interestingly enough, someone else who I removed from my life approximately five months ago just got in touch with me and I'm not sure why. This person, who I'll call S, was interested in me but wanted to remain friends for a while before dating. During this time, he was a total ass with me. He was bossy, demanding, and self-centered and lectured me almost constantly. I finally decided to back away and when I did – when I took just one step back – he became angry and started ignoring me. When I asked if he was mad, he'd repeatedly say no despite the fact that contact with him had very obviously dropped to almost zilch. Then he rushed off and got another girlfriend which didn't bother me because, by then, I'd decided I didn't want a boyfriend who'd treat me like a dog anyways. But after weeks of no contact, I'd had enough – I deleted him and when I changed my number, I didn't give it to him.

Yesterday, for whatever reason, he messaged me to ask how I am. So naturally the first thing I did was rub my weight loss in his face. xD I'm trying to learn something from this – I don't need to constantly keep in touch. And maybe I'm a little more memorable than I give myself credit for.


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