Hello Tribe friends, I have been out of action for a bit here on the blogs. So wanna say thanks to al those well wishes for happy holidays and happy new years. They are all definatly appreciated. I have had a holiday season swamped with visitors and all kinds of stuff. And now I guess its back to the same old stuff till next year rolls around. Honestly i feel no real great hopes for the new year , nor any horrible expectations either. I seem a bit stuck as if I lived a month of non real life where everything is swept away under the rug for a bit in order to satisfy the omnipresent holiday cheer. So I go back to life as i know it. Freinds and family gone with the promise to stay in touch..etc ..etc. My New years resolution is to get back in the gym. Although I actually dropped a few pounds throughout this years festivities without really trying. Having lived through the worst years of HIV…no the worst years of AIDS, and somehow making it through, I sometimes wonder aloud to myself when spending yet another evening alone what happened to the old life I had. New Years always does this to me. Gets me all into looking back and seeing the perspective of life. And I am not ashamed to admit that sometimes I look back and wish for the old days and when i see ahead I see nothing but Dr visits, piles of meds, hardly an extra dime to be found for silly things like fun. There are times when it is discouraging. Like I said, perhaps its just the time of year. It is realy too bad that everyone on the tribe lives in my computer instead of right next door or down the street where I could pop in for coffee or you could do the same. I guess itscompanionship that I miss the most. I used to have it, friends beyond count always calling to go do this or go do that. Now it seems a bit more stark after the holidays that yet another year will pass like the others. Blah! lol…OMG, I do sound depressing, who knows what 2013 will bring, Hopefully peace and content. Thanks again to all here for being my friend….Scott
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Not ashamed
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