hello folks. just wanted to sayy…lots of people have been leaving me comments and i have neglected to reply. it's to the point where i am mixing people up and can't remember who said what and when and yadda-yadda. i apologize. i am extremely tired and my mind is never focused lately. i can only sleep for an hour at a time…i think that's one of the causes for this. so, an update to anyone wondering, my labor will be induced this week..could be anytime between tomorrow and thursday. i will find that out at the doctor in the morning. in all honesty i've been feeling very reclusive lately. i don't even really want to talk to people. that sounds quite awful, but it's true. i have no idea why. i'm very paranoid lately about the baby. i don't think i will be a good parent, or even a decent one. i've never even held a baby before. i'm even getting anxious about all the people who will be calling and dropping by and ohhing and awweing over him, i really wish they would all just go away. it's already annoying having everyone constantly talking about how they can't wait to babysit him and come over and stay with me to help. i don't want all these people hovering around me. i've tried very hard ever since i had to stop taking my medication to be social and positive and happy but i'm getting very sick of it all. there are only a few individuals who i feel comfortable around anymore. what's worse is, my husband wants me to breastfeed for atleast two weeks which means i cant take my medication for even longer. i have a feeling i am going to NEED it. i already need it. i don't want anything bad to happen in the mean time. hopefully i will feel better soon. maybe i'm just having a bad week. i don't know. i will stop rambling now.

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