My birthday is coming up soon and I’m getting anxious as I usually do when the day comes closer. I was excited for my 25th birthday but every birthday after that I have completely dreaded. It reminds me that I’m getting older and I’m not any closer to the life I expected for myself at that age. I’m trying to practice mindfulness and just be in the moment but it’s hard to stay in that mental space. I’m on a journey on trying to be happy with what I have and not wishing for more. It sounds impossible in the mental space I’m at now but my new mantra is “it always seems impossible until it’s done”. One thing that gets me really depressed is the fact that I’ve never been in a relationship before… I mean I actually have but it doesn’t feel like it. I have this belief that once I find a partner I can relax and everything will be better, but why the hell am I waiting for somebody to live my life? the logical side of me realizes how dumb that sounds. I’ve been reading a book about being happy single and let’s see how I feel after reading that….
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I am 26, nearly 27 and I know what you mean about feeling older. I used to compare myself to other people on social media who are my age, married have children and I would think should I be doing that too? I still do compare myself sometimes but I just try to think, am I happy with where I am now? I know it’s hard but dont let other people dictate how you live your life, you do you!
thanks for sharing! yes im still working on being happy with what i have because when i think about it i love the freedom of being single