OK, so this may seem like a counterproductive and contrary statement, but yes, I am greatful for the depression I experienced. You’re probably scratching your head in amazement right now!
So the reason I say this is actually quite simple, during recovery I started to slowly see positive benefits, day by day negative thoughts would bombard my mind, each time a precious opportunity to use the tools I learned from therapy. With each use these skills got stronger, almost like exercising a muscle. The strange thing was, after a while I found myself automatically using the tools in my day to day life, not just for depression and OCD. I started to see the benefits like my level of confidence increase, I became more assertive, I became more insightful of other’s emotional behaviours and best of all, I felt more motivated to live life!
I guess it’s that old idea of neuroplasticity at play. The theory that the more a particular thought is followed, the stronger the neurological pathways leading to that thought become.
Now I find myself capable of taking that leap of faith, striving to face my fears, lusting after life. Each trouble and strife I face, I face with my old friend, my CBT toolbox, together we can weather any storm.
In a strange way, I feel stronger than any person who has never known the bitter sting of mental illness. In some ways I feel blessed for the events that led me to therapy, because for me it worked. It was like hitting the mental health jackpot at the bingo, only this prize sum keeps on growing.
I guess that’s the whole point of this blog, give therapy a try, dare to dream of recovery, aim high for happiness. It’s better than feeling sorry for yourself surely?