I'm new to this site. Not sure if it's something thats really for me. I've had an anxiety disorder my whole life. I remember from being a small child. A year ago i gave birth to a baby boy. About two months after I started having severe anxiety attacks/panic attacks that led me to a stay in the hospital for a few days to get stable. I'm a normal person, married, work, tons of friends. It's been a long road to recovery and lucky enough my therapist and Dr's specialize in Post Partun Depression,Anxiety disorders. I'm on the right meds and am getting the help I need. My husband has acutally jumped on it with me and is seeing a therapist as well. I'm starting to feel that my life is getting to be better than it's ever been even before the baby for the first time in my life. The only problem I haveis my inlaws are most of the reason that I have anxiety still today. Mother in law issues, sister in law issues. They are all so dysfunctional, but I have to accept them because they are my husbands family. My son's 1st birthday is this Saturday and as each day goes by, the anxiety get worse and worse. I'm taking xanax more than I have in a long time. It's because I have to see them. They are well aware that I don't have good feelings about them. My husband has requested that we all meet and talk and that he supports me 100%. He's had arguments with his family telling them how messed up they are and they are sort of getting it. When I get the attacks, days later I get sick with throwing up and pains. They tell me it disrupts my digestion. So, I'm 5 days away and I'm having a hard time just thinking of seeing them. There will be 30 other people there, but still. I'll get the, can I help, Oh let me do it. I just want to be left alone, but this isn't something that I'll get my way with.
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Wishing you good thoughts. Dont be afraid to talk about them here online. It helps sometimes to get things off your mind. Sometimes it even keeps the digestion problems from occurring cause you let it out in a different way.
I wish you the best. Good Luck.
Tim
Wow, this sounds exactly like what I dealt with about three years ago. I gave birth to my first child in 2008 and my mother died the following day which put me straight into PPD. I had an anxiety d/o prior to that of course, so that predisposed me to it. My in laws are also dysfunctional and the way I got through it was just focusing on my baby girl. It took me almost a year before I could actually enjoy my new baby due to the grieving and the fear that I was going to die at any minute. My mother died of a heart attack and I had high blood pressure after my daughters birth – so I was sure I too, would have a heart attack/stroke. All I can say is, give it time. Focus on that sweet baby boy and let your husband help all he can. Just breathe, pretend like those 30 people aren\'t there. (Maybe easier said than done though lol) Play with your baby, focus on the party, try to see the world thru his little eyes. Good luck to ya girl! Oh, and welcome to AT! You will find lots of good folks here! I am Deb.
Thank you very much. I was hesitant to join the site, but I think it\'s something that I need and that will be helpful.