Beyond the horizon of the place we lived when we were young
In a world of magnets and miracles
Our thoughts strayed constantly and without boundary
The ringing of the division bell had begun

Along the Long Road and on down the Causeway
Do they still meet there by the Cut

There was a ragged band that followed in our footsteps
Running before time took our dreams away
Leaving the myriad small creatures trying to tie us to the ground
To a life consumed by slow decay

The grass was greener
The light was brighter
With friends surrounded
The nights of wonder

Looking beyond the embers of bridges glowing behind us
To a glimpse of how green it was on the other side
Steps taken forwards but sleepwalking back again
Dragged by the force of some inner tide

At a higher altitude with flag unfurled
We reached the dizzy heights of that dreamed of world

Encumbered forever by desire and ambition
There's a hunger still unsatisfied
Our weary eyes still stray to the horizon
Though down this road we've been so many times

The grass was greener
The light was brighter
The taste was sweeter
The nights of wonder
With friends surrounded
The dawn mist glowing
The water flowing
The endless river
Forever and ever…

Pink Floyd: High Hopes from "The Division Bell"

It is time to let it go. I have the right to receive absolution. I have carried this heartache and burden far too long. A decade is far too long to keep paying for mistakes I made as a young woman, to keep aching over something I had no power over to change it's outcome, to alter it's course.

I am removing you from my life. No more self-flaggelation, no more self-hate for a history that is just that- history. I am not that person any longer, and I have paid in tears and pain forso long that Ithought it would be with me forever. But I forgive myself~ I deserve to be free, to be able to stop looking behind me at a past I cannot change, and instead to look forward toall thebeauty in life that has escaped me for so long due to your inhabitance in my mind andheart.

Let me go.

1 Comment
  1. Aswa 12 years ago

    "I need to stop looking behind me at a past I cannot change, and instead to look forward to all the beauty in life that has escaped me for so long due to your inhabitance in my mind and heart."  

    That right there ~ I can relate.  Let's fly and be free.  Aswa

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