Dear friends, revcently I posted a very long blog in which I pretty much spilled my guts about some very persona problems which included my family and about a perscription drug addicion that had managed to sneek up on me over the last couple of years. To ALL my friends who responded I thank you deeply! Thank you for the kind words of encouragement and especially to those who gave me a reality check and a swift kick in the pants(Tecknique!).   Daniel62kwlwu, thank you for that beautiful and heartfelt prayer that you gave for me. You are a special angel put here on earth I think…

There are a few of you who misunderstood and thought that I'm still taking these drugs…No, I haven't taken them since about late August of 2010! I flushed the last of them back then and have not renewed any perscriptions for them. Weirdly enough, the repercussions of the drug use( the depression and anxiety attacks) got worse AFTER I quit the stuff. I suppose it should have been no surprise that the drugs were masking the real problems but it really did catch me off guard when it all started to fall apart after the drug use! As the saying goes" The piper must be paid! " and sure enough, I'm paying for it. I don't know if or when my sleep patterns will ever again approach normal because I've had sleep disorders since I was a child and have rarely known a night of uninturrupted sleep. I can live with that, but the chronic depression and panic attacks took me totally off guard. I still find it hard to go out in public without litteraly hours of mental prep time BUT I'm getting better at it ! Our neighborhood is making noises about starting up an organic co-op vegatable garden and that really appeals to me…we'll see where it goes…I know that for one thing I spend far too much time in my head and alone and that I have to find a way to change that…

By the way, anyone who is intrested in a small scale orgainic vegetable garden should check out this website:

http://www.eldoradoheirloomseeds.com/

Again, thank you my friends for the love and support in my hour of need. I hope that the old Loki that makes people laugh will make a return again one of these days!

Love, Peace and hair Grease! david q:-)