I feel a bone deep loneliness that won’t leave me be in peace. I’m embarrassed to admit it, I don’t know why. I guess it makes me feel weak to need other people. I’ve actually never truly felt like this before, this desperate need to be with someone else even if it’s just for a few minutes.
I’m worried I’ll be alone forever. Even coming here feels like a grasp at straws, yelling into a sea of people and hoping that anyone at all will hear me.
I just want a friend. That’s so humiliating man but it’s the bare faced truth. I need a friend so badly I can barely breathe. I just want to talk with someone and have them enjoy the things I have to say and laugh with someone else and not feel like I’m being annoying or clingy.
Joining these tribes is basically my last attempt at making any sort of connection with other people. Somehow, after two decades of life I have found myself completely and utterly alone. I have family but I can’t really talk to them about the things that stress me out. I have no friends.
I’ve ended up without any friends and I have no clue how to make any. Man. In the words of Zuko: That’s rough, buddy.
I think we are all here to learn to be our own best friend first. Strength lies in admitting that we are who were are. We are labeled by the world and in turn we label ourselves somehow as unworthy of the best life has to offer. We who carry our minds in a different way carry a great weight that most people cannot understand or handle. You are strong, brave and capable. Treat yourself with kindness for awhile and rest.
Thank you for your words. I need to take that first line to heart and learn to be my own best friend before anything else.