So I just got up a few minutes ago. I was up a bit this morning to help my mom get ready to work. but after I crashed but it was only 7:41am so I though for sure i'd be up before 1pm.

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but no I wasn't woke up at 3:10, horrified because I missed my phone appoint with mark (he's a Chaplin i knew at Arnold Palmer childens hospital, and he agreed he'd help my spiritually guide since he's not actually a therapist. he's even doing this for free,like omg)

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I reached him- apologizing profusely. he said they had just gotten two kids coming in from a car accident so he was needed. but we agreed on 1pm tomorrow…ugh

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That was the second time I missed him i feel so bad.

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but i didn't get any sleep (which is usual) but this time the pills were helping a bit until mom kept calling me over and over to reassure her things are going to be fine.

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she's been dealing with 3 bitchy girls on her team this year (she teaches 2nd grade) and apparently they made up a new system how to pick up the kids in a meeting right BEFORE the had to go pick them up.

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long-story-short, mom forgot because alot was on her mind (the kids she was picking up wasn't even her own class,wtf) so the kids she was supposed to pick up were in the hall by themselves for LESS the a minute..

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but one of the bitchy girls told her principle. (and shes very lovely but shes a whipped dog when it comes to the district) so the district told her to call DCF and she has to have a hearing…

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i mean, that's fucking crazy right? then this morning dad let another bomb drop saying the check he sent out out diane (our landlady) bounced. so now we had to see if my disibilty check came in et (which it did) and so he's gonna pay her half today and half next week…

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to much bullshit going on. I KNOW i'm getting an ulcer (i had 8 at one time in the past) so I definitely know what they feel like.

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I can barely keep myself alive how can I try to rescue 3 other people?