So… It's like 4 in the morning and I'm still up… Fun… I guess my insomnia wants to kick in right now… I'm on my brothers iPod right now. That's the only reason why I can be on the internet right now… But it's whatever honestly. I didn't have school today because of the weather this morning. I thought it was awesome. The bad thing though is that I totally would hAve skipped regardless whether they had closed school or not. First I would have asked my mother if I could have skipped. And if that would fail, which I'm sure it would have, would simply have found another way to skip. I did not want to go to school today and the weather saved me from doing something bad. Thank you mother nature!!! For once you are kind to me. Anyways, don't tell my mother but my boyfriend came over and visited me for about an hour. Now before you jump to conclusion like I'm sure most of you do, we didnt do anything. We actually just watched tv. And it was awesome because we haven't done anything like that in forever. You know,just hang out with little worry of something bad happening!! Though we were kind of jumpy because we didn't now if my mother was going to come home earlier than usual. But she didn't which I am mighty glad. I think the whole forbidding us to date is rather stupid. I mean if you think about it, the whole reason shy she did it is because she thought that me and him were doing things that was shouldn't have been doing. But if you think about it the whole forbidding thing makes it to where the only time we can see each other is when we are alone. That's just going to want us to do something that we are suppose to do or maybe aren't ready to do. Just to clarify we haven't done anything. But I'm sure even if we thought about it this whole forbidding situation would not help anything. I have of course not told my mother of any of this because this would probably not help my case. Though i wish she would just trust me enough to see that I'm not going to end up pregnant at 16 like all of her fears are telling her. Despite her strong beliefs I am smarter than she thinks I am and I just wish she would give me some credit on that. All my life I have done nothing to please her with going through all the crappy decisions she's made. I was the one that always had to suffer through them. Though when I finally get someone worth telling my feelings to(something I dont do… Like at all…) she just had to take him away from me. I don't see how that's even remotely far. Yes he is 18 but I've been going out with him for more than a year (one year, five months, two weeks, and two days (don't be that impressed I just consulted a calendar though that was mainly for the weeks and days…)). I'm pretty sure if he wanted to get into my pants he would have already tried (and failed) by now. He hasn't. I just…. I kind of wish mom knew how hard it is for me neverydqy I see her and her boyfriend all over each other and it just hurts. It hurts to know that I have to hide this amazing relationship from the one person that gave birth to me. I'm thankful that we are still together despite all that has happened. But because of all that has happened we only see each other maybe thirty minutes a day on a normalis day. though sometimes even less. It just hurts…So I should probably stop writing. I probably already have a five page blog on here. Thank you to anyone who actually read that and sorry if there are mess ups. I try to catch them as I go but I'm sure I missed some. Like I said I'm on an iPod so it's kind of hard to do so with a tiny little screen. Thanks again. I highly doubt anyone read it past that first sentence anyways. Who wants to listen to a depressed and lonely teenager who misses her boyfriend and complains about her mother too much. Sounds like too much petty teen drama to me… -sigh-