After a horrible struggle with extreme anxiety this summer, I have finally began to see life again. Thanks to my family, friends, and doctors for their undying support and love that has guided me back to happiness. If there is one positive thing to say about the summer, it would be that it brought me closer to these wonderful people and I value their relationships more than anything. I never thought I would be the kind of person who would give up on life, but over the summer I would say I was that person. I don't like to think back upon it much because it still scares me to think I almost gave up on the most beautiful thing God gave me. It still frightens me everyday, but now I have finally become strong enough to value myself and how important each person is to this world. I have now started my sohpomore year of college and I couldn't be happier. My leadership postition on campus is going really well and I cannon wait to develop the leadership skills of other students on campus. Classes have also been great and it makes me realize how important staying busy is. Sitting around thinking about myself all summer was my problem. There is no chance in hell that I will take another summer off. I don't dwell upon my stugggle and it has helped to know that other people go through what I have gone through. You guys have truly opened my eyes. I love hearing your stories and seeing how you got through rough patches in your lives. Since my life is finally going the way I want it to go, I have some advice for those who are still searching for answers. The most important thing I learned from my anxiety is that it won't cure itself. You have to accept and just go out and DO SOMETHING. It doesn't matter if it is something big, just find something you love and do it. Don't be selfish, anxiety is selfish, help others and make a difference in the world. Also, don't be afraid to share your story. I have done that lately and it has helped me to realize that other people in the world go through similar hardships. Don't dwell on the past. I don't feel like I have become a "new" Jade, I have finally just found what makes me happy. I wake up every morning with a positive outlook on life. I can finally relax and focus upon the good things. I thank all of you who have commented to me on this website. You have truly made me happy and I pray for all of you. I know this is not the end of my battle and I have accepted that I will have to deal with anxiety for the rest of my life. But now I know that it will not defeat me. I will never give up and I will never fall into a pit of uncertainty about my life again. I am not scared anymore and I am happy to be the person I am. Sorry this is so lengthy but I wanted to express my gratitude to this community and hope that all of you find the answers you are looking for. Never give up, there is no reason to. Finally I will leave you with what the ER doctor told me when I was at my low…"Get this girl out of here, she has a life to live." As simple as it was, it holds true to everyone. You all have a life, you all have something to put out into this world. Find it and just DO SOMETHING about it! God Bless.

2 Comments
  1. morethanthis 13 years ago

    That is awesome. You have done some amazing things. Your strength shows through in this blog. You have completely figured out the whole thing, really you have. You even accept that it will never go away but it is manageable. You are an inspiration and proof that you can be happy, be productive and have anxiety. You should be so proud of what you have accomplished. You are fantastic, awesome, never forget that.

    xxx

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  2. gotalifetolive 13 years ago

    thanks so much!

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