Here Before

I’ve seen myself here before

Laying face down on the floor

Seeing myself out of my body

Like I’m fighting out in Saudi

Up so high then down so low

Toxic positivity fo sho

Never knew it could be like this

Pugnacious to find bliss

All I need is that sweet balance

To marry my energies like tetravalence

I have faith I’ll make it through this day

No longer seeing life as grey

One day I’ll be healed from this pain

Or at least it will soften on my brain

Gotta let myself feel these emotions

To get out of the deep oceans

I wish this poem had a happy ending

But there’s a long road ahead amending

Before I was afraid to feel

Keeping me from making this deal

I didn’t want to admit I was sad

Which only put me in a sever case of GAD

Dismissing fear, I’m ready to slow down

Gotta fix that tilting crown

I see the good & I see the bad

Organize them in decad

Hoping to find a truer version of myself

Taking time for all the subjects on the shelf

Fighting a better fight this time

To tender to my inner hime