My boyfriend and I broke up because a difference in values. It hurts so much because we both still love each other so much but we kept on butting heads over the same things over and over again. No one is perfect, and had his issues, but aside from all of that, he was perfect. This was a man who treated me exactly how I want to be treated- he treated me as his equal, was affectionate, accepted me for who I am, always said things nicely, and was just a genuine person who I totally trusted. He was my best friend and the best man I've ever been with. I know that sounds like it wouldn't be hard to find another person who possessed all of these qualities, but you don't know how hard it was to find him and I feel like it'll be hard to find another. I don't want to move on from this, it feels like I'll never be able to because it's so hard to trust guys. And Im not even close to being ready to open myself up. I'm afraid that I'm going to turn into a cold hearted bitch who isolates herself and hates everyone. I don't want to become that, but it's instinctively what I want to do to protect myself. I feel so vulnerable. My family makes me feel worse because they didn't even like him ( which was part of why my bf and I broke up), my close friends all live in other states and are too busy with their boyfriends, and the only other close friend in my life was him. He was my everything and I lost him. I lost everything, but I had no other choice but to end things with him because I couldn't continue something that would blow up in my face down the road. I miss him though. I miss him everyday. It's hard to function, to even breath. I just don't know how I'm going to move on from this without really damaging myself. I've fallen into a deeper depression and I have no one to talk to or hug or confide in. All I have is myself and my dog and the internet. I'm alone and I have no hope for anything right now.I hate this. I miss him <3…. a lot.
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