I just have been going though a hard time . i have from summer when my car was broke. I just think I am feeling a bit better and this creative block is gone then i still am stuck down in it. I have papers to write for school and i guess i hope writing here helps me get them written. i am ging though what a dear friend calls growing pains!! LOl say what at 46 hell yea i have fought any form of growing up because it means i am grewing older. any how so then being the friend I am i had afriend call he helps with Artemis alot( my dog) and he was hey can you get me back for helping with the dog, i would have helped any how . he asked to stay on my futon a night. i said if you need a few days it is all good. So i go to where I was for turkey day leaving him here, he has apt sat dog sat i figure he is all ok no worries.I come home my back door is open a slight bit the back gate is open a little bit. I am upset that he left it open i lock it and lock my back door i call him hey dork you left the back gate open , made me abit upset. this I said to the VM. i called one other time and then text hey are you ok sensing by now something was wrong when i found his car parked in the spot for the apt next door. i then today get a call from him his voice has been hurt he says I am sorry dude i said for what, he said what I did I am thinking ok what have I missed around here . he had himself 51/50 by ambulence while I was off having turkey dinner. BTW the martha gram is for one of the papers I am writting, i am looking to get inspired where ever i may at this point! so end of story after he called he asked me to bring things to him he had left he needed his lappie and such. so i went to see him not sure what i would see. I get there and I am not sure what way is front on this place so i drive around and end up bejind the place who do I see… him at first glance I did not relize until i looked again. he had snuck out to grab a smoke. he was hey how did you find me .. i said I am wired that way. he laughed. he even had his iv pole with him. so i found parking and took his back pack in. i found out he had been heraing these voices of his for two weeks. i told him it was ok if it took him comein to my place to get the help he needed so be it. my apt has been a calm for him and it worked. i huess i felt like if i let the world around me drive me to it i may be like him in the hospital hearing voices inside my head. thank you for reading… he is getting the help he needs. he had a real bad childhood , some scares from the past are harder to defend off. be well, rememebr self care is important too! pay attention to the people close to you they may really need you too. dye over and out. ps i do feel lots better! I may have to write more on here.