Yeah so I'm listening to sad music and really a little bummed. I am doing a lot with my life and have a lot of responsibilities and I am questioning if I am good enough to have all I have and am I good enough to do my job. I know this is my disease talking, but it is still talking to me and I'm letting it. Thank goodness I get to go to a meeting tommarow. Wow it has been two weeks. That is crazy I can't let that happen again. [br] Anyway like my profile says I am a resident advisor at my college and I have a great floor of girls but they haven't been that great recently and they have been breaking a lot of rules and I have had to enforce a lot of rules. Last night I had to take away a microwave and a toaster oven from the same room and I kind of feel bad because if these girls get written up one more time they are kicked off campus, and as much as I don't want that to happen because it will mess thier lives up for a little while they are the ones not following the rules not me, so I need to realize that they deserve what is coming to them. [br] It is hard being an addict being in a position of authority for 42 college girls…..somtimes I really want to just fit in and I feel like I will never fit in, but than I realize that I don't want to fit in with these girls I want to be me and hold on to all the knowledge I have gained from my experiances. [br] Thanks for letting me ramble, this is the closest I have to a meeting right now so it feels good to get it out. [br] Just for today I will accept where I am in life, trust God, and know that I am right where I am supossed to be!! [br] Meg