Between me, my two brothers, and my mother, we all have jobs. We all chip in to keep up the mortgage payments in the place we currently live. We had 3 cars between the 4 of us. It wasn't too hard to work things out. One of us just had to drop off and pick up the middle brother from work, on weekdays, since he was the only one without a car. Well, on the way home from picking him up one day about a month ago, at about noonish, when my car breaks down. Long story short, I had to scrap it and save up for another vehicle. Well, about a 1-1 1/2 weeks later, my younger brother was taking the middle one to work, and he comes back in, waking me up, and saying that his car won't start, now. Jumping it had no success. So, we're down to one car for four people, now.

I had school classes I HAD to attend, too, in addition to all of us having jobs, so things were a bit difficult. I got a call at work, a few nights later, and my mother told me that she had looked at and drove a car and that I could buy it for about 1500 dollars. She said it drove well, and had a nice engine, even though it had some miles on it. So, I trusted her judgement, and before I had even driven the car myself, I handed him the money, signed the titlework, and Voila. It was mine. On the way back, I was to follow my mother who knew the directions better than I had. Once I started driving, it seemed like the "surge" was way too high in my opinion, even for an older vehicle. I felt that it was too reluctant to go when given gas. Almost like the gas pedal was kinda "sludgy". Well, not too far along, the engine turned off and the wheels locked.

I steered to the middle of the road, in the middle lane of the two-way street as best I could and tried to restart it. It took a minute, and I got it going again. I waited a bit for her to return and gave up, so I drove down the road and tried to make a few calls. I got it going, and made it home, but the car in my opinion has drove shitty since I bought it. My mother and her male "friend" both drove it and said it was OK. I disagreed, and now a week later, even they agree that the "surge" has gotten worse, and it feels like it's driving really bad. (Which I had said from the start and if I would have drove it myself, I would NOT have bought the car).

So, long story short, my brother's waiting to get his car back, and hopefully it's OK. Because with the condition of my "new" (to me, anyway) car, i feel like it could go, any time, if we don't get it looked at. So, I must baby it and drive only when necessary.

NOW, health care. I'm supposed to have ex-military benefits. Well, I set up the insurance and enrollment with the government benefits. Step one, after is that I had to find a primary care physician who would work with the "fee basis" program I am under. I guess because of my priority status, I was told to find an outside physician, because of how crowded the VA medical clinics were. After calling a few top clinics who said they didn't accept that payment program, I got annoyed.

I called up VA themselves, at the number given to me in my packet to call, in regards to this. I asked them if they could provide a list of primary care providers with whom they worked with. They said they had no such lists, but could give me a number or two. I called both numbers GIVEN BY THE VA, and neither said they accepted the payment plan. Now, that was about a month ago. I got fed up and tried to ask my job about their health care plan, but I was told that it was expensive, and I'd be better off sticking with the government benefits.

So, I'm about fed up with the whole process. I know because of my throat, feeling like shit every day, I gotta do something. If I even have a drink or two, it can lead to a sore throat or irritable sinuses. It's really not good, but alas. We live in a country where even fucking AIDS must turn a goddamn profit. (AAAAAAAAAAAHH! KILLLLLL!)

Not to mention I HATE my job, and HATE my classes. BUT, with all the time and money I put into this degree, it would be stupid not to finish it. Then again, as much as I hate and sturggle with computer programming, I'm REALLY unsure of what I want to do in my future. All this, for my poor ass, among some other things…..I'm really unmotivated about life, right now.