Okay, again I haven't written in a while.. Not because I'm busy but just because sometimes it is hard for me to be able to just do something like this.

My life has been.. weird lately. I"m not really sure what to make of it. I have good things that are happening, as well as bad things. I'm kind of one of those people who feel that they can never have good things unless something bad comes along with it. I guess I look at it as nothing is ever really truely "good" because its tainted in some way. It's a really bad way to view life, but meh.. it is what it is.

My whole life I have seen therapists. About 2 months ago I decided that I would have to upgrade to a psychologist and MAN can i tell the difference! Its like, this lady actually knows what she is talking about. She is teaching me a practice called mindfullness practice. It is unlike anything I have ever done, and it has been working WONDERS. Basically, as humans we tend to focus on either the past, or the future. We are always planning, daydreaming, and thinking. Mindfullness practice takes us back to the present moment: what is happening NOW. To practice it, you sit and meditate and focus on everyhtingv you hear, feel, touch, and taste. And whenever you find that you are thinking about something OTHER then the present (what I"m going to do today..etc) you gently focus yourself back into the present and what is happening.

I've also met this new guy. Hes great, we get along. But in my stupidity, i keep thinking hes doing something behind my back.. and that he doesnt really like me.. or that hes using me. Its a stupid idea, but i guess i worry about those kinds of things.