my therapist and i officially called it quits.  He says the organization cannot accommodate all their clientele, but I still cant help but take it personally.  While he says that he’ll continue to see me until i find someone else, i think that in their eyes i’m already gone.  Jesus, I havent even seen him in over 3 months.  I guess its for the best – i cannot tolerate my psychiatrist anyway.  During my last appt, i asked him how he was doing, and he said, ‘ i dont understand – is that some sort of greeting?’ – these people are from mars. 

I think that I dont need therapy anyway.  I write every day, and that seems to work out better fior me than sitting with a stranger for 50 minutes, and I leave there feeling no better anyway.  They dont give a shit, or they havent convinced me that they do give a shit.

They tell me to start a facebook account, and reconnect with people from my past; people i went to high school with.  In theory it sounds good, but, I had a rough time in high school, not popular, the butt of endless jokes – so why in the sweet f*ck would I want to reconnect with these a-holes? 

It doesnt matter how far we have gotten in life, or how much we have succeeded, family, kids, whatever – I am totally convinced that the human brain, at the end of the day, stops maturing after high school. 

Facebook is evil, especially for people like me – I signed up for 3 days, and signed off because of memories that came rushing back that I thought I long since forgotten about.

I have social anxiety, and social phobia – and facebook only served to remind me how people do not change. And an added bonus has been endless nightmares depicting instances in my high school life so humiliating that I cannot offer any more detail.

Do you ever feel like packing up your stuff, and starting over somewhere new?

 

 

 

 

 

 

5 Comments
  1. Author
    mattbenjamin50 15 years ago

     Reads to me that you just have a bad therapist. I see my psychiatrist all the time. However, I pay my psychiatrist directly. Maybe you should focus on finding a better therapist.

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  2. Author
    ancientgeekcrone 15 years ago

    I agree that you and your psychiatrist are not a good fit.  A good fit can produce good results.                    I was happy to hear that you are journeling and it works for you.  I find it a wonderful tool for iscovering ones self and as  a respite from ones demons.     Social anxiety and social phobia cut deep scars in the psyche,  Cause a lot of lonliness too.         I agree with you facebook is a waste of time and space.          Sice you are here, I assume you have found some comfort among us.   Hand in there , there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  Best wishes and good luck

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  3. Author
    apehangmom 15 years ago

    Hey I left this guy,,,( A psychaitrist) he yelled at me in his office… I cried and got up ) , its no big deal… some times this happens… and it happens alot.

    1) call your insurance company….  go to the website .. find a provider

    2) this happens all the time.. due to insurance companieschanging and new insurance taking over ..  and what not…

    3)Call the differnt new doctors and see if they take your insurance… its hard but worth the phone call… ask like how long is the waits… what is my co pay.. how MANY VISITS DO I HAVE LEFT? stuff like that .. Is the doctor taking new patienst… its hard but keep trying… if you dont try anything new nothing will happen.

     

    I asked a primary care to help me with OCD .. He made me leave the paractice and the 1, 000 doctors that made up this crazy  intercoastal practice… I felt hurt and demeaned… it sucked .

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  4. Author
    flower1 15 years ago

    Sorry about what happened. I have had some very bad therapist and psychiatrists too. I swear there are some good ones out there but they are so hard to find (its like a needle in a haystack). Its just scary when you realize that the person that is supposed to be helping you has issues but doesn’t even know it. I finally found someone good but there are some issues going on now so I am not sure how its going to go. Its great that you write everyday that in itself is amazing therapy.

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  5. Author
    lanalana 15 years ago

    Hi there friend.

    Why ping pong? lol…just had to ask.   I had the opposite experience in high school…enjoyed it, had no social anxiety…but now, seems things have changed.  I treat seeing people from my past as an exposure.  Proving to myself that I am ok just the way I am…ocd in all.

    Big hug,

    L

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