I found this picture today, and it' so true…anyone else feel like that?

Well, Anyway…Today much hasn't happened, though no one in the neighborhood has tv because of the storm knocking it out, so Comcast has to fix it or whatever, I don't really care to be honest.

It's been raining all day, So I liked that part…and my dogs have been with me in my room, so I haven't had to deal with anyone else right now…Though ONE thing has made me smile… (Other than my dogs…)

You see, Black Veil Brides released a new Music video, and I was one of the first people to see it because I'm apart of the fan club, and it was….AMAZING…I loved it so much, I'm still watching it.

Link: www.youtube.com/watch

So yeah, other than this, my dogs and the storm outside nothing has been helpful. Also, Since I haven't alot to do, I'm also working on the letter I'm planning on sending Ali…

I don't want to sound like such an idiot, But I'm completely like pouring out all my thoughts into this letter, But what If I back out? and I don't send it? or what if I do send it, and she doesn't even read it?

Or she reads it and laughs? All these thoughts are entering my mind, and wont leave. Not only that but…

Kim hasn't been answering my texts since monday, So the fear of when Ali did that is coming back, What if Kim doesn't wanna deal with me anymore either? Her and Maddie are even going to Metrocon….(It's in Tampa this time)

I want to go…But my anxiety keeps me from doing so, not only that but I don't want to burden them either, I just don't know what to think but I can't handle losing anyone else right now…It scares me to death almost.

I feel like my heart is going to burst. Plus, Whenever I get courage to text them or when I receive an e-mail or whatever, I get so scared to open and read it. Like when my younger cousin sends me e-mails or a text last night-

It took my an hour to get the courage and read it, same with Maddie's text. I just don't know…

Again, I feel like i'm falling behind and that this cycle is never going to stop…

Well, I guess that's all for now…I might post something else later on, I'm just gonna go back to watching the storm outside

1 Comment
  1. Chantale 8 years ago

    Just take it one day at a time! You have been through so much in the last little while. Try to deal with one thing at a time and it won\'t be so overwhelming. I am happy to hear that you are home and that your pets are keeping you company. Take care.

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