My last story was cut off. I guess I didn't copy/paste the whole thing, or I ran out of room.

Either way I'm putting them here again. I wrote them after key moments, while coming to terms with my daughter's death.

I hope they touch someone.

peace

PS – My girlfriend is back, a little saner, and still sober.

She celebrated one year on May 20th.

peace

I held a child today

  

I stood in front of the mirror, and looked into my face;

 

I wondered just how far, had I fallen from Grace?

 

But my God is forgiving, He's loving and mild;

 

And today He allowed me to hold a child.

 

It has been so long, over two decades ago;

 

When I lost my child, the hardest of blows.

 

Then through the years of anger and ire;

 

Until I finally surrendered, I was just too tired.

 

Then turning over my will, and giving it to Him;

 

Was the start of the miracles; the journey begins.

 

But TODAY, was the day, a monumental event;

 

When into my arms, from Heaven was sent.

 

A BEAUTIFUL child, Gerber couldn't ask for more;

 

When I held her, I wondered, what does God have in store?

 

I had gone by my job, I had to see Mrs. Cook;

 

She had money to give me, which she took from a book.

 

But before she could get it, she turned and she said,

 

Do you mind holding her, she's already been fed.

 

In her hands was the daughter of their mother’s son;

 

"I'll take her right back, just as soon as I'm done."

 

I explained that it's been awhile, many years to be true;

 

She smiled and she said, it's easy to do.

 

It's like riding a bicycle, you never forget;

 

Now put out your arms, don’t worry, don’t fret.

 

Then into my arms, was placed a new life;

 

The last time that happened, it was done by my wife.

 

Her skin was like silk, her eyes soft & mild;

 

It'd been 20 years, since I'd held a child

 

As I held this infant, who smelled like milk and baby;

 

I thought I'd never again feel it, but now thought;

 

Just maybe.

 

Because when I lost Joy, my heart had been broken;

 

And the healing before now, had been just a token.

 

You see healing my pain, had for so long been a goal;

 

But in an instant, this child, has made my heart whole.

 

I held a child today.

 

Thank you, Rootie

    

Visiting Day

 By CharlieG 

I've made my way, across a hot scorched prairie;

 

To this very spot, where I must unbury.

 

Memories laid to rest, that have been put into the ground;

 

What I had fought to untangle, I am now once again, bound.

 

It's rope drawn so tight, it cuts into my skin;

 

I might loosen it a little, but I will never win.

 

My burden's shouldered, and this I must carry;

 

As I enter the cemetery.

 

The memories come, I can't make them leave;

 

They are here to make certain, I remember to grieve.

 

Show's over, curtains drawn, no more acting brave;

 

As I slowly approach, my little girl's grave.

 

Now sitting beside her, telling Joy how I feel;

 

How can I describe it?  It's feeling surreal.

 

Then I give her my chip, and tell her I'm trying;

 

I tell her everything’s great! But she knows that I'm lying.

 

So I cry for awhile, the father bereaved:

 

Then climb to my feet and get ready to leave

 

   

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