hello everyone. i am new to this site and i am looking for some support and advice. i will try to make this long story as short as possible. so, i have been off and on with my fellow since high school. its been about 14 years now. about 7 months ago we decided to become serious. in the beginning our relationship was almost picture perfect. something out of a fairy tale. about 3 months into our relationship, things began to change. i knew he was recreationally doing pills (vikes, percs, oxys, etc.), but i thought it was for a buzz and not serious. as time went on, things began to go downhill. he would become very agitated at the most miniscule problems, lash out on me, force me to leave his house (which i basically lived in), and even went as far as pinning me up against a wall and screaming and spitting inches from my face over what seemed to be a bump in the road regarding our relationship woes. he then admitted to me that he had an opiate addiction and it had been going on for the past few years. he is on house arrest for his second dui and has been for the past 5 months. he wanted to all of the sudden "get serious" with me when he knew this was all going down… my first thoughts were that he was using me for rides to work, company, sex, etc. but then he had me so convinced that he wanted to start a family and marry me. we went looking for rings, he was planning on asking my dad's permission, the works.. so… the addiction got so bad that he was and still is blowing entire paychecks on his addiction to the point where he can't even pay his bills and keep hot water on for his son to take showers when he is over. i truly love him and have tried everything in my power to make it work. ive tried finding him help (he swears he wants it). but at the end of the day, its constant anger, blame, and evil comments to me. it is so aggravating. i seriously do not know what to do anymore. i tried to give him an ultimatum. me or the pills. worked for a short period of time, but then its back to the blame. i have pulled money out of my account and played enabler. i really am at a loss here. he blows through money and even lies to family members about bills that are overdue to get his fix. please. someone shed some light on the situation for me. i dont want to leave, but i feel as though this whole relationship has been a lie from the gate and all i was was a taxi service, an atm machine, and a scapegoat for the real problem. all responses appreciated in advance.

3 Comments
  1. pcm54 10 years ago

    Sorry, I would leave and not look back.  Find a man who loves and treasures you not drugs and your money.  Not only is he an addict who refuses help, he is a bad person.  Leave him. Now.  You have friends here.  I am one.

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  2. libchick04 10 years ago

    Thank you so much! You have no idea how much that means to me. You're right about what you said. I never thought of it that way. Thank you a million. I really need support right now.

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  3. pcm54 10 years ago

    You have a friend in your corner.   I will listen and help if you want/  I just want to be there for you.  I check this site every day.  I hope you can leave me messages so I know you are okay!!!   Blessings and peace, Chris

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