David just left for drill for the next four days and of course I had to go and screw everything up like I always do. I looked at him standing there in his ACU’s and could not stop the tears from pouring down my face like they always do when I think about what I gave up. I know that I made him feel like crap and I honestly wasn’t trying to I just hate that he gets to wear a uniform and I don’t. It isn’t his fault. I made the decision myself. But it is the hardest one I have ever had to live with. It is not fair to me that he gets to wear that uniform and complain about how much he hates being in the millitary, and I don’t even get the option to. I gave it up so that he could stay in and now all he does is complain about it. I am not saying he should have given it up, I love him very much and I don’t regret what I did, but I don’t think he understands the impact it has on me. I want that uniform. I would be proud as can be to wear it. I would enjoy every second of training, it would be an honor to get that experience. But instead the people who get that are complaining about it, or getting trashed every second at training, or skipping out on drill because they know they will fail their UA’s. These are the pathetic people that I am surorunded by who are serving our country. Yes, America, take a look. Those soldiers that everyone adores and loves aren’t all they are cracked up to be. 90% of the ones I have met (and I know a lot of them as my step dad is a recruiter) are alcoholics and partiers who don’t care about anything else. Granted, most of them are fresh out of training too. I can only hope that maybe one day all of these people will open up their eyes and see what a blessing it is to serve your country. I wish that I could more than anything else in the world.
-
Need help
stacla, , Depression, Depression, Relationships, 3
Been living with my girlfriend and 4 yr old boy for 6 years and my darling girlfriend has had...
-
Horrible, emotional day!!
naomijane, , Depression, Career, Suicide, 0
where do i start?! doctor surgery messed up my appointment twice! and when i did go i was an...
-
A little nervous about tomorrow
xoallasunxo, , Depression, Addiction, Personality Disorder, Sleep Disorders, Weight Loss, 0
:dizzy: So I have to get surgery tomorrow on my mouth. because my gum grew over my wisdom tooth...
-
Day 8
venturer99, , Anxiety, Depression, Anxiety, 0
Entry 8 – okay so I had a pretty eventful day yesterday. some things happened that I couldn’t talk...
-
New thoughts…
saphyrre, , Depression, Anger, Depression, Parenting, Questions, Relationships, 1
wow, it's been almost a year since I wrote a blog of any kind. Now, really, should I be...
-
Coping
snowdreamer, , Depression, Anger, Depression, Medication, Sleep Disorders, 1
I woke up this morning to the realization that bad things don't go away just because you sleep. Wouldn't...
-
Trying to catch up
Aspiretodream, , Depression, Child, 0
I've had it pretty good. Here lately, I've been getting more and more involved, and it makes everything go...
-
Pain Makes a Strange Bedfellow
SullenGirl76, , Anxiety, Depression, Uncategorized, Anger, Career, Chronic Pain, PTSD, Relationships, Sleep Disorders, 2
So, to add insult to injury (so to speak), I’ve been dealing with a lot of physical pain lately....
thank you, and i am glad someone at least partly understands where I am coming from. But our situations are a lot different. you sound like you tried your ass of to serve, i didnt so much. I enlisted, and quit so that I could keep my relationship and my sanity. only thing is I still dont have my sanity.